………We are jolly green giants, walking the Earth with guns. These people we wasted here today are the finest human beings we will ever know. After we rotate back to the world, we’re gonna miss not having anyone around that’s worth shooting.
You know how I have determined I am getting old? No really. It finally clicked. See to me age is more or less a state of mind. I never was one to sweat or worry about birthdays or dread the big 30 or couch couch 40. Generally speaking I am a firm believer you’re only as old as you feel. I feel good most of the time. I may not be as spry as I was in my early twenties, it may take a little longer to recover from a hang over, but age to me is generally a non-issue. I have dated younger, older no trouble.
Finally it clicked to me. I am getting fucking old. How did all this come about, you may ask? Easy! I found a new favorite restaurant.
Pho Now. Its a Vietnamese food place around the corner from the house. I had read about it online a couple months ago. My brother finally went to it and said the food was good. I pulled in and tried it this past Saturday. Its really good. Imagine Thai food-ish but better.
Anyway I stopped in and ate there this past Saturday. I wanted banh mi which is basically a sandwich made out of French baguette. They were out of bread, so I went with a bowl of basically ramen. However this isn’t like the $.25 cent ramen noodles most of us ate to get through college or the service. This has beef and meatballs, bean sprouts, cilantro, carrots basil and jalapeños. Spicy and flavorful. It was almost like I was back on some street in Siagon, and Charlie was celebrating TET new years by shooting off fireworks down in dog patch. Ok maybe not that part, but it was really good. It was pretty cheap, and it was a mile and a half from the house.
I go home satisfied. I thought about that damn meal all freaking day. It was fresh, flavorful, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. It was like I had met my soulmate for christ’s sake. Don’t get me wrong I have had and made great food in my life. What was so special about this other then what I have stated above?
Now like three or four days later, I am still thinking about that damn food like its a woman. No really, I am not losing my mind goddamn it. Or maybe I am? Oh shit. I have been debating about going back for more of this food but, and I swear I have been having an internal struggle. “Do I go back so soon? Should a wait a week before I show back up? If I go again so soon will I seem desperate?”
See what I mean? I have gotten so old, I am now treating new restaurant and food find like I have met the next great love of my life. What the hell happened to me? How did this happen? What is next? Thanking god I can still get horizontal, pee standing up and regularly take a good shit?
I don’t like this realization one bit. I love that damn food and restaurant, but how I have somehow replaced the love and excitement for say a beautiful woman for that of a bowl of good gook noodles is troubling.
My only rationalization is that this is what its like to get old.
I refuse to let this happen. I will go cleanse my soul with a good dose of internet pornography tonight. Right after I translate a few Vietnamese words on Google translator and decide what I am ordering for dinner tomorrow night.