It’s Beginning to Look A lot Like..

Elf…something. Just not Christmas. Where the hell has the time gone? It was Thanksgiving just yesterday and tomorrow is Christmas. Well not literally but you know what I mean. Every time I turn around it seems like another month has escaped me.

Thanksgiving this year was spent with friends and family. A special and admittedly belated thanks goes out to the Busby’s for allowing me to crash their thanksgiving meal after work. Amy outdid herself with stuffed mushrooms and artichoke while Allen deep fried a bird. A small group of us got together to share a meal. Its these times, I believe, where you can sit down with friends and family and eat together where one really appreciates what one has in life. It doesn’t take much to be happy, but when shared with those in your life it certainly rejuvenates one soul.

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That was my traditional Thanksgiving this year. Many thanks Amy and Allen. Oh and Debbie. That cranberry jello walnuts stuff was pretty damn good.

Ok that catches me up for November. Lets get to work on December. Pretty much all that comes to my mind so far in December is a simple, “WTF”

Of course Mr. Obama hauls ass to Nelson Mandela’s memorial service. Expected no biggie right? Sure. No Problem. Except one little thing. Well two little things actually. Barry pisses off the wookie Michelle Obama when he grabs a selfie with the hot blond white girl ambassador or prime minister of some nordic country sitting next to him. Second was the douche bag hearing impaired interpreter that really didn’t know the first goddamn thing in sign language. 

Yes its true. During Nelson Mandela’s memorial service the gentleman who was a foot away from the podium translating famous world leaders (including Obama’s) speeches into sign language for the hearing impaired was in fact doing nothing more then waving runners home on infield triples. I am not kidding. You can’t make this shit up, he didn’t “sign” the first word in accepted sign language.

Ok thats a little weird right? Its gets better. A day or so later when the news spreads that this poor bastard doesn’t know shit, he comes out that “I am schizophrenic and was having a hallucination” to explain his rather odd behavior while attempting to translate the speeches. Finally some truth. The guy is actually schizophrenic. Yep nuttier then squirrel shit. In fact has a criminal record a mile long. Charged with rape, murder and a half a dozen other violent crimes.

I have been thinking how crazy is this poor bastard and the situation he gotten himself into? What possibly could be said or done to take the spot light off this guy and be even more ridiculous then this buffoon on a national stage next to world leaders essentially playing retarded patty cakes?

Well you guessed it. Our secret service puts our fucking President within two feet of this guy! Don’t get me wrong. Mr. Obama makes Jimmy Carter look like Sir Isaac Fucking Newton. However I do not want to see our President next to some African nut job on the worlds stage attacked and hacked to pieces with a machete. Where the fuck was the secret service on this one? Oh I know. Probably with the NSA watching all the fucking porn I am surfing. Go USA. America #1!!

pissedAnd when you think Mr Obama can’t plunge us into anymore of a bizarro world, I believe he stroked off Raul Castro somewhere exit stage left. To think all Michelle Obama the wookie cared about was when she was overheard saying “dis nigga best stay away from those honkey bitches with his selfie picture taking ass”.

Changing gears a bit.

Lately in the news I have been hearing a lot about this musical act or this artist canceling shows at Sea World.

I guess Sea World in Orlando from time to time has musical concerts at the theme park. I don’t associate Sea World with national musical acts but I guess its a thing now. Hey all the power to them I guess. Its a free world after all.

Anyway as it turns out these musical acts and artists are canceling shows at Sea World because of a recent documentary concerning Sea World and their Orca whales. The name of the movie is titled “BlackFish”. I found it on Netflix this weekend and watched it. Its also on Apple TV and probably most video on demand pay per views with most regional cable tv providers.

I would suggest anyone to watch this movie. Like most documentary movies you have to take it all with a grain of salt and understand the writers, directors, producers have a certain agenda. You have to watch with an open mind, separate fact from opinion and conclude your own position.

All that being said, again I say watch the movie. It may open your eyes to something I can safely assume most of us have ignored or blindly accepted.

Most of you know I live in Florida. Most of you live here too. For those of you who live out of state, or in another country, Sea World is in my back yard. You know it as a Disney like attraction in Orlando. It is. Its a company out to make money. They do. I have grown up around the ocean. I kill and eat the animals I have harvested from the ocean. Generally speaking I think I have been a good steward of the environment. Never take what I can’t eat on the sea or land. Never needlessly be cruel to animals domestic or wild.

I have been to Sea World more then a half dozen times in my life. I know the Sea World company line. “We are here to show, teach, learn about the animals of the oceans”. You hear and see it on the news and TV. Sea World is no different then a zoo, whats the big deal? Right?

What Sea World knows and does to the Orcas (killer whales) is appalling and disgraceful. I can remember going to Sea World as a small child. Shamu the killer whale was the main attraction at the time. The original Shamu is long gone. Now its a whale named Tilikum.

What Sea World doesn’t tell you or the trainers at the time is pretty astonishing. You know trainers that used to swim and run the shows with the whales at Sea World whom by the way are NOT marine biologists with advanced degrees, nope just good swimmers ,is that Tilikum has killed as of today three people while in captivity.

You see every other marine biologist or zoological expert that knows anything about Orcas in the wild will tell you that Orcas do not thrive in captivity. Since Sea World has been banned in pretty much all the states in this nation where Orcas exist and in other nations from taking Orcas from the wild they have been using Tilikum as the head of their in house breeding program. Yep they stud him out and he has sired more then twenty killer whales in captivity with about eleven surviving today.

So whats the problem Brock? They are making their own killer whales now and not taking anything from the wild. That would be ok but heres the only problem. Tilikum as been in captivity for so long and is so emotionally screwed up what you see as a killer whale is not at all what a killer whale in the wild is actually like.

Look at it like this. Imagine if you will that from today forward the only way to extend the human race was to be artificially inseminated with cum from Charles Manson.

Tilikum killed his first trainer twenty something years ago while in a Sea Land park in British Columbia. From there Sea World brought him to Orlando where he killed a civilian (whom sea world claimed stayed in park over night and snuck in to the tank to swim with Tilikum) around the year 2000. Then again around 2009 you probably remember the news when Tilikum grabbed the female trainer and killed her in front of a crowd.

TilikumHere’s  some more facts Sea World will not tell you. Orcas in the wild live about as long as humans. 70+ years. In captivity about 35 years.  Notice the dorsal fin curled over in the picture of Tilikum? No killer whale ever observed in the wild has shown this dorsal fin curled over. Only in captivity does this happen to killer whales and its a sign of mental distress. Killer whales in captivity regularly bite and attack each other. Killer whales in the wild seldom do this. Killer whales in the wild mate and the offspring stay with the mother forever and live in autonomous pods for life with their own specific language. There is no recorded event in history of a killer whale in the wild killing a human. Only whales in captivity have ever killed a human.

What is this rant about Brock? I don’t even know that this is a rant. Merely a discussion and factual talk about what Sea World and other animal entertainment like organizations claim they are providing for scientific research and the reality of the almighty dollar.

I am a capitalist. Make money if you can make money. Even use a captured animal from the wild if you want to. Go for it. Wrestle alligators. Charm deadly snakes. Stick your head in a lions open mouth. Knock yourself out. Where I have a problem is the world of bullshit you use to misinform people with to gain acceptance and justify the inhumane and shitty treatment of the animals to the extent of deadly attacks on the staff and general danger to the public.

If I choose to go to a circus in town and see the animals and a pissed off elephant goes crazy and tramples me and my kid to death then so be it. I know the circus is bullshit and mistreat animals and its my choice. Im informed and I accepted the risk. If i am attacked and killed I should get nothing. If I choose not to go to the circus and give them my money then the circus gets nothing. All is fair and everyone is equally informed. See how that works? Pretty simple right?

Sea World will have you believe what they are doing with the Orcas, Dolphins, Manatees, Sea Lions, Polar Bears, and every other damn thing they have swimming in a tank is for science, and the betterment of human kind from the understanding of our environment. That is clearly a load of fat bullshit. Its about making money through the exploitation of wild animals. I think they have a right to do it and you have a right to choose to spend your money going to see it. However, in your freedom, do it with honesty and be informed. Sure you will see beautiful and intelligent animals. Just know that it is nothing at all what those animals do or represent in the wild.

Alright I have rambled along enough. Lets try and wrap this bitch up and make some sense. Easy. Everything in life is like this. This isn’t just Sea World and Killer whales. Its also Walmart and cheap shoes. Its Obamacare. Its religion. Its taxes. Don’t blindly accept the picture on the outside and what you can easily see. Don’t let anyone do the thinking for you. Be honest look for the truth and then decide.

Let ‘er rip tater chips.

Mad Men is nice but Christina Hendricks is one hot piece of ass.

joanSo I have been watching Mad Men again this season. It’s been on AMC for a few years now and if you been under a rock, its essentially about a Madison Avenue advertising agency set in the 1960’s.

The first couple of years were great, then for a couple of years the writing sucked (IMHO) and now its getting back to good.

Its pretty much been the number one show for the last five years or so and if you haven’t checked it out get your Netflix on and settle in for some binge TV.

Christina Hendricks plays the roll of Joan Harris. She is head of the secretary pool and pretty much the glue of the agency. She also bangs Roger, one of the partners and is mother to his bastard child. Don Draper may be a smooth operator, steel and sex appeal, but Joan Harris just down right rocks my world. She is a bad bitch. They just don’t make women like that anymore. I watch this show and wish and dream that I lived and was of age during this era. I would have been bigger then pop top beer cans. I could have ruled the world with my very own Joan Harris.

Really what happened to the work place? The one where I could light up a smoke in my office, pour a scotch and smack a secretary on the ass and tell her “Good job sweetheart, now copy that letter to the partners, buy my wife a valentines day scarf, and bring me another scotch.”

I think it was the Xerox copiers, computers, internet, and probably some scumbag lawyers. Life was so much simpler with short hand, IBM Selectric typewriters, mimeograph machines, Camel unfiltered cigarettes and good scotch.

We NEEDED women for those things. Rotary dial phones and a switchboard, women. Dictation, women. Supply closet inventory, women. Opening the mail, women. Getting me another scotch, women.

Is it any wonder in the 1960’s when business operated this way with vital business roles fulfilled by women, (with great tits and ass) at the direction of incredibly smart and business savvy men, we were a nation of greatness? We went to the moon. Chevy Camaros and Corvettes had 400 horsepower and the Detroit auto industry was booming. Swanson made a fried chicken TV dinner you could actually eat. The little chocolate brownie cake was GOOD! Captain Kangaroo, Mr. Green Jeans and Mr. Moose didnt give two shits about your kid losing at picture pages. Winners went home and fucked the prom queen, losers who cried got a ton of ping pong balls dropped on their heads in shame. We were a country of look good, work hard rise to the top, or screw up, have a case of body oder and eat your boogers then get picked last for the kickball team.

Why? Because beautiful women, who were smart, knew their place, and kept their mouths shut, let us men think we were in charge, placated our tender egos and organized our shit. Beautiful women made us look good and we succeeded on their hard work and went out and conquered more. They brought us scotch.

Now look at us. I have to type my own shit! I can’t even inappropriately look at the secretaries ass much less give it a good pat and compliment her on her appearance without a trip to human resources with corporate counsel present.

Is it any wonder our economy is in the toilet? We don’t produce shit anymore. We’re a country of whiners and we reward mediocracy. We don’t want to offend the losers by elevating the winners. Everyones equal. I have to get my own goddamn scotch!

We’re going backwards my friends.

Well, I’m glad that’s over.

Max Overdrive Has the whole world gone mad? What the hell is going on out there? It’s like the earth has been caught up in a nearby passing comet’s trail and all the machines humans have gone bat-shit crazy. Only difference is there is no cool AC/DC soundtrack and Emilio Esteves isn’t a short order cook at a truck stop gas station.

Cris Kyle, Navy Seal, and the greatest sniper to come out of the Iraq/Afghanistan wars was killed this weekend by another broken veteran on a gun range in Texas. I can’t help but notice how Obama’s liberal media machine is all over anything to do with gun violence. Its a shame really the media can’t report unbiased and news worthy facts. The facts are simple. Every single day, TWENTY-TWO war veterans commit suicide. Let that sink in and read it again. I’ll help you. Every single day, TWENTY-TWO war veterans commit suicide. The same exact veterans that are getting there medical and healthcare benefits reduced more and more by the very President sitting in the oval office right now.

I wish I had spoke to someone after I got back from the first Gulf War. Instead I just kept my mouth shut, didnt talk much about what I saw, and kept on and carried on. After all hearing my father moan and groan in bed with nightmares from Vietnam as a kid was normal. As I look and think back now, aside from pissing them off with snoring, I have probably scared the shit out of every woman I have ever slept in the same bed with since 1993 with occasional nightmares and waking up in cold sweats. Sorry ladies, where ever you may be now.

Last week this wackjob (another fucked up veteran) jumps on a school bus, blasts the driver and takes a kid hostage into an underground bunker for a week. Thankfully today that all ended with the child safe and the veteran dead.

What could go so bad in your head to make one do that? I can’t say I know or understand, but I will say what some see in battle is some horrendous shit. In my case bad, but not bad in as much as my buddies getting hurt next to me. But in the subsequent Iraq and Afghanistan wars, Beirut, Vietnam, that high intensity close in combat seeing your friends get hurt/killed or injured yourself doesn’t leave your mind. It hasn’t for me and comparatively speaking what I did and saw was a cakewalk.

It’s sad, but more infuriating that mental health aid isn’t more available to veterans. When it is the stigma attached to it is like you’re some kind of pussy is a real issue. The ironic thing is and you can mark my words now, in the near future all kinds of mental health assets and federal funds are going to be made available all over this country to make sure someone who wants to buy a hand gun is suitable to own one. There will be so much bureaucratic bullshit involved with mental health and gun ownership all while the veterans who need the help will not get it and continue on in pain and hell between their ears. Only thing is they probably wont get a gun to kill themselves with, so its back to the pills. booze, highway overpasses.

The Super Bowl was weird this year. The game was great in the second half. Beyonce was good. The commercials? Eh. Was I the only one thinking in my head when they pulled out the Newtown or whatever elementary school choir and thought to myself, WTF? Is it now pretty much accepted that every single national tragedy we go through we must rally up the survivors and somehow make a spectacle of them at championship sporting events? First its Captain Sully. Now the kids who didn’t get blown away. Whats next? Little Ethan who was saved from the bunker in Alabama today, gets to wave the green flag at the Indy 500?

I watched the brand new Netflix series House of Cards this weekend. Thirteen episodes of season one. Kevin Spacey, Robin Wright. About a congressman from South Carolina. It was the best thing I have watched since Sopranos, Mad Men, Sons of Anarchy, and Walking Dead. Do yourself a favor sign up for Netflix for thirty days free and watch this series. If you like politics, you will love this series. Its brand new, on Netflix only and its absolutely awesome. There is a second season coming out with another thirteen episodes probably towards the end of the year. I can not wait. David Fincher produces and directs some episodes. Its well done. Two thumbs up, five stars, highly recommend. Here is the best part. Netflix put out all the episodes of the entire season at one time. I binged the entire season Friday night and Saturday morning.

I’ll close this for now and hope that all the crazy in the world calms down a little.

Let ‘er rip, tater chip!